To the End

06/08/2014

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To the End

What do you see
when you look into my face
what thoughts and images flash through?

What do you feel
as you hover above
looking down
acting like a clown?

What about when you cuddle up close
looking happy
looking morose?

What about when you pat my chin
when you want attention
when you touch my skin?

We greet each other
every day
a good morning
a hug
a grateful sigh
each day that arrives
brings a happy thought
a moment
a pause…
we still have
just that little bit more time.

And every day
you do the same thing
you look puzzled, bemused
as the alarm starts to ring
you tilt your head
snuggle up close
no words need to be said
just another few minutes
a little more time
before I have to get out of bed.

I should be used to this by now
I tell myself each day
yet still I watch and wonder
as you move… startled
as the alarm starts to play.

How do you hear that noise
how does it sound
how much I wish you could tell me
how I wish I could understand.

People say that you don’t care
how can I know your feelings are true
but to connect so deeply to another
with such total utter unconditionality
to deny that instinctive elemental love
I just don’t get
that mentality.

I’ve always known that time will approach
I know I’ve done everything I should
I also know that when all is said and done
My self I will still reproach.

Because
not enough time did I give
not all my words were soft
in ignorance I wanted to stay
to keep my world’s reality at bay.

I hope and pray this didn’t add
to any suffering and pain you had
I just could not believe it true
this day could come so soon.

And sure enough
that day did come
time to leave
our physical bond undone.

Together to that very end
you knew you weren’t alone
protected
safe
surrounded by love
wrapped in my embrace.

My heart
my spirit
my very soul
into the mystery of beyond you go.

Words © July 2014 Michelle Payne
Picture found circulating freely online


If this were your last day

25/06/2014

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If this were your last day

If this were your last day
what would you stop and notice?

Would you see the sun as it
peeked through a blanket of darkness
Would you watch as it turned into
a glowing orb of shimmering molten orange?
Or would you lay there
and ingest the peace of a silent moment
second by second?

If this were your last day
what would you marvel at that’s around you?
The sound of birdsong, the beat of a butterfly’s wings
the hum of a city’s traffic?

Would you be active or sedentary?
Engaging or detaching?

If this were your last day
what would be the things that matter to you?
The house, the car, the latest tech and games?
Or would it be the people, the hugs
the laughter and smiles
the pain and the tears that have accumulated over time?
Would there be happiness, hand held walks
or would there be anger, blame or fights?

If this were your last day on earth
would you Give or Take
be Love or Hate?

If this were your last day
Today
Here
Now

What kind of day would you choose to have?

If this were your last day…

Words © February 2014 Michelle Payne
Picture © August 2013 Michelle Payne


Affirmation of the Week

14/01/2013

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“I LISTEN TO MY GUT INSTINCT”

We all come across situations, people and choices that can make us feel uneasy… hell, sometimes we can even want to run in the opposite direction because we get a feeling so strongly!

Gut instinct… it’s a strong thing… a force, a power… it can be intuition, feelings, emotion… our guts are our *power house*… the home of the 3rd chakra (solar plexus) for those who are interested in the holistic side of life… and for those who are not, if you think about it, when we get stressed or things don’t seem right, then that can activate our adrenals, which turns on the flight or fight response, which in turn fires up the acid in our stomachs… anyway, holistically, this area can represent many things including our power and control over events in our lives… or perhaps should that be our belief of how we control things?

Looking back, I’ve always had this kind of gut reaction… sometimes weakly, sometimes strongly… once it was so loud I actually thought I heard an alarm bell go off above my head… seriously! It would highlight when to be wary of something, whether that be years ago going home after school and I would know, on the way home, that I would be in trouble for something when I actually got there… to more recent time when things just haven’t felt “right”.

Yet how can we trust the feeling? I mean really, truly, trust the little warning sign that flares up instead… because let’s be honest… it can also do that when we’re scared… when we are fearful… even when we’re unsure of something and are wanting an iron clad guarantee of how something is going to turn out! That’ll be the feeling of control again 🙂

As does everyone I guess, I have doubted my gut instinct… I have second guessed myself… yet when I really listen to that gut instinct it never fails to support me. The times when it has been loudest and I’ve not listened… have brought about some of the biggest learning lessons I would endure… and some of the hardest to get out of… would have been much easier if I hadn’t been so pig-headed as to not listen in the first place *grin*!

So questions for you to ask yourself this week are:

How often do you listen to your gut instinct?
When don’t you listen to your gut instinct?
How do you know when your gut instinct is calling you?
How loud is it?
How often has it been right?
How often have you ignored it?
Why have you ignored it?
What’s happened when you’ve ignored it?
What’s happened when you listened to it?

Wishing you a wonderful week ahead ♥

Image origin: Unknown

© 2013 Michelle Payne


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